Old stuff written for Broker Agent Magazine circa 2004 – just thought I would post it for you.
Are You a Guest or a Host?
“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal. That they are endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. And a government pension and free medical care and a free education and no taxes and no need to take responsibility for the consequences of their own actions.”
– from the Preamble to the U.S. Declaration of Independence, revised for 2004.
There are times when it seems as if the great American experiment in personal freedom has evolved into a society whose issues revolve more around the question of “what can my country do for me?” than “what can I do for my country?” If only John F. Kennedy were here today!
We’ve all gone to parties from time to time. We receive invitations, set aside some time from our daily schedules, have the requisite good time, thank our hosts and go home. That’s it. Been there, done that with very little in the way of personal involvement to ensure that the party is a success. The total experience consists simply of having a good time at somebody else’s house, eating their food, drinking their booze, saying ‘thank you very much’ and heading out the door.
Too many Americans go through their entire lives playing the passive role of ‘guest’ rather than the pro-active role of ‘host’. It just seems easier to go to someone else’s party rather than hosting, planning and cleaning up after a party of their own. Living life as a guest means sitting around waiting for invitations and if someone doesn’t invite, there are no parties.
I have noticed the same syndrome manifesting itself in personal and professional relationships: wives who depend on their husbands’ ability to provide for all their wants and needs; girls expecting their dates to wine and dine them as if it’s their birthright; employees expecting their companies to provide medical insurance, pensions and ever-increasing salaries in return for less and less productive work; citizens expecting the government to provide cradle-to-grave welfare programs of one form or another. And the list goes on.
What made America great was the willingness of its citizens to work hard and earn enough to pay for what they wanted. Immigrants came to this country for the opportunity to earn a better life for themselves and their children. Today it seems people dream more of early retirement than success through hard work, and if there is something they want, it goes on the credit card whether they can afford it or not. Far too many immigrants come to America to take advantage of a broad litany of welfare programs or free education for their children. Where excellence was once rewarded, it is now often penalized, and enforced mediocrity seems to be the goal of far too many of our “enlightened” politicians.
One of the main reasons that the Soviet Union lost the Cold War was because the Communist regime forced the role of guest on an entire civilization. The incentive to excel in a free enterprise environment was stripped away in favor of the grayness of government central control. While West Germany was producing world-class Mercedes Benz and BMW’s, East Germany was producing Trabants (originally, cleverly named by the Communist bureaucrats the “AWZ P70”), one of the worst cars of the last half of the twentieth century (a close competitor for the “Worst” title was the infamous Yugo, another product of a socialist economy).
The time has come to reverse the trend. The world has become far too competitive, and digital communications has made it far too easy for employers to replace lazy, overpaid or obsolete workers with others in places like India or China who share the attitudes of Americans of an earlier age. Even jobs once thought to be too local to be “outsourced” are going abroad. Globalization has made it possible for a heart patient in Chicago or Los Angeles to have his EKG read and his condition diagnosed by a cardiologist thousands of miles away in Bombay. Even real estate sales has been profoundly affected, though there still is no substitute for getting in the car and visiting the property. Online multiple listing services and photographic virtual tours have given buyers far more independence and forced sales agents to go beyond the traditional roles of tour guides and taxi drivers to become multi-faceted real estate consultants.
For true happiness and success, we must host rather than be guests of our own lives. Instead of waiting for someone else to entertain us, we must become the entertainers, taking responsibility not only for our own growth and well-being, but for the consequences of our actions as well. The sooner we realize that we are truly the masters of our own destinies, the sooner we will develop the requisite perspective that will enable us to stop waiting for something to happen and go out and make it happen. We must get our butts off our office chairs to go out prospecting, knocking on doors, meeting our future clients face to face and never be content to play the role of a “secret agent.”
Far too many of us live as if we were guests of the government, guests of our employers, even guests of our families. Isn’t it time that we took control and became the hosts of our lives?
Jason Hartman, CRS, GRI, CSP is the author of “Become The Brand of Choice – Make Your Name A Powerful Brand and Earn Millions” and President of Empowered Investor International. For more information visit www.JasonHartman.com or www.BrandofChoice.com
